But not as much as I heart proper English.

THE CHEVRON/TEXACO OIL COMPANY
1092 CHEVRON LAYOUT, WUSE ZONE 2,
WUSE, ABUJA. NIGERIA.

THE CHEVRON/TEXACO OFFICIAL PRIZE NOTIFICATION.

You have been selected in the on-going Chevron/Texaco award held this may 2008. We the promo booard are pleased to inform you that you alongside four(4) othetr lucky winners have been approved for a payment of $200,000.00 USD. (Two hundred thousand Dollars) in cash. Note that this promotion is mainly aimed at alleviating poverty, it is also aimed at encouraging internet Users worldwide. This email is randomly sent to five people worldwide. If you did receive this email, it means you are one of the five(5) lucky winners. Your verification number is: (CT-222-6747,FGN/P-900-56).
This promotion is held to mark Chevron`s Aniversary. You will be required to fill out your information in the below given form and send it to the funds release officer in West Africa, as this is co-sponsored by the Federal Government of Nigeria and the Pepsi Corporation. Please find his contact details below:

CLAIMS PROCESSING OFFICER:
Mr. Kenneth Davids
EMAIL: chevronclaimsofficer@gmail.com
Phone: +2347085737091
You are also advised to provide him with the under listed information as soon as possible:

NAME IN FULL:
CONTACT ADDRESS:
AGE:
NATIONALITY:
OCCUPATION:
PHONE:
FAX:
MOBILE:
SEX (M/F):
ANNUAL INCOME:
REMARKS ABOUT CHEVRON/TEXACO:

We are glad to have you as one of our luckly winners.

Yours Sincerely,
Mr. Chike Madu.
Online Co-ordinator…

Co-sponsors of this online promotion are listed herein: Shell Oil Company, Pepsi Corporation, and the Federal Government of Nigeria.

Honestly, I couldn’t let this go. The scam is amateur, but show signs of creativity. The writing, however, is atrocious. So, I decided I would clean it up for our friends in Nigeria. My comments are in bold. Here’s to making smarter scammers. And shame on you if you fell for it.

You have been selected in the on-going Chevron/Texaco award (Chevron-Texaco Award, also, the award should have a specific name…) held this may (May is a month and should be capitalized and followed by a comma; may (notice the lower case letter and lack of a comma?) is a verb that denotes permission.) 2008. We the promo booard (promo board…but even that is wrong. Official correspondences will not make use of slang shortening. Promotional boards would have a real name attached to them…say the name of the particular contest…) are pleased to inform you that you alongside four(4) othetr (Really? Did the email you copied this from contain this typo too? I’m sure you’ve got a pirated copy of MSWord on your computer, run your scams through a spell checker) lucky winners have been approved for a payment of $200,000.00 USD. (Two hundred thousand Dollars) (Hey jackass, parenthetical notations are my deal! Besides, you do not need to spell that out. Winners can read numbers) in cash (instant red flag. No award is ever given in cash. Awards are given in check form and done at public functions. No company just gives away money without milking some good public relations out of it). Note that this promotion (is it a promotion, or an award? This section makes no sense.) is mainly aimed at alleviating poverty, (comma splice. I hope your English teacher is rolling over in her grave) it (obscure pronoun reference, when you start a sentence with a pronoun it refers to the last noun used, in this case, poverty) is also aimed at encouraging internet Users (Internet users, nice effort though) worldwide. This email is randomly sent to five people worldwide. If you did receive this email, it means you are one of the five(5) lucky winners. Your verification number is: (CT-222-6747,FGN/P-900-56).

This promotion is held to mark Chevron`s Aniversary (Anniversary, again, pirate a copy of Microsoft Word and make use of the spell checker). You will be required to fill out your information in the below given form and send it to the funds release officer in West Africa, as this is co-sponsored by the Federal Government of Nigeria (big red flag. There are dozens of US news shows that warn people not to ship anything to Nigeria. Average American’s cannot even send packages to Nigeria through UPS without taking great steps on their own behalf to ensure that the package is not stopped by security and searched) and the Pepsi Corporation (First “Pepsico”. Second, you said at the beginning of my email that this was Chevron-Texaco, now you’re saying Chevron-Pepsico? Stick to your freaking story). Please find his contact details below:

I am.

My typically Friday and Saturday writing schedule was delayed this week as I was sidetracked by two new stories: a David Ford concert and album review, and Mario Kart Wii.

Also, I’m working through my notes for BSG, writing that up is a bit more difficult than writing up Lost (less clues and conjecture, more opinion…and the last two episodes didn’t sit particularly well). And then there’s how this might be the summer that the Geeks inherit the Box Office.

So, lots of stuff in the chute. Now I just need to get me a 28 hour day…

Did this man

ever thought this song was going to be covered by these girls

and used to sell this:

?

Though the consequences of the writers’ strike is still being felt in many series, we on the other side of the television now have the remainder of season 4 of Lost back. Last night’s episode (24 April 2008) marked the first post-strike written episode and one that started by immediately answering questions.

As the show has shifted from flashbacks to flashforwards with Season 4, clues are more easily worked backwards. So, here are the revelations, seemingly poignant references, and newly raised questions from last night’s episode. My personal theories are listed at the end.

Revelations

• We now know who shot Karl and Rousseau – it was the strike team from the boat. Later actions move to suggest that Ben actually had nothing to do with this act, though I’m sure he wasn’t hurt by either of the immediate victims’ demise.
• We are given a date, 21 October 2005, and an event to match that. This happens sometime after Sayid’s wife is murdered, and before he starts working for Ben ( approximately 9 days from Nadia’s death).
• Nadia’s death, killed by those working for Charles Widmore is the given reason why Sayid begins working for Ben. Ben, smiled as he walked away from Sayid following Sayid joining Team Linus, which given Ben’s past, seems to suggest that he isn’t telling Sayid everything.
• Jack is self medicating. This occurs in the flashfowards (Oxycontin) and bore a striking resemblance to the “antibiotics” he claimed he was taking for a stomach bug.
• Ben says he got off the island by taking Desmond’s boat and following a bearing (most likely the same bearing that worked for Michael). Whether this is true or not (I’m leaning towards not) is debatable.
• The Doctor from the boat’s body washed up on shore with his throat slit (though the wound looked less deep than necessary and overly wide). However, according to the folks on the boat the doctor is alive and well. Time anomaly anyone?
• Bernard knows Morse code. This suggests prior military experience or at least a HAM radio fetish. We know that Bernard was a dentist, and judging by his actions fighting against the others, he can’t really shoot.
• Oh, and Ben can summon the “smoke monster.” This knowledge wasn’t too welcomed by John Locke.
• Hugo has the ability to find Jacob’s cottage (somehow).

References

• At the hotel in Tunisia, Ben is listed as Dean Moriarty. Anyone who’s read the Beat classic “On the Road” should have been tipped off by this, but the name seems out of place for Ben. There seems to be a character mismatch here, Dean Moriarty (inspired by real life Neal Cassidy) was much more frantic than Ben, but towards the end of the book seems to be driven by the same motivations (family life). Perhaps a more fitting pseudonym would have been James Moriarty (the nemesis/arch-enemy of Sherlock Holmes).

New Questions:

• When Ben wakes up in Sahara desert, he is wearing a Dharma park. Visible on that parka, if only briefly was the name Halliwax. A quick Google search of the term reveals that this is the name of one of the Dharma scientist who appeared in the orientation video for the Orchid station.
• Who shot Ben? And when did he become such a badass with a collapsible baton?
• What isn’t Ben telling Sayid about Nadia’s death? He’s never been wholly truthful before.
• Ben told Widmore that “(he) changed the rules” and that he is going to kill Penelope because of this. The relationship between Widmore and Ben Linus was also fleshed out in greater detail, but begged what is sure to be one of this seasons larger questions: Why can’t Ben kill Charles Widmore? And further more, what rules are there in place as Team Island battles Team Widmore for control of the island?
• Why is Jack getting sick? At the end of the episode Jack got violently ill after learning that the boat never intended to help them off the island.

Theories

• Jacob is a former Dharma scientist who was caught up in an experiment that went wrong. He is currently existing between two dimensions and is only visible to a select few – not due to anything holy, but perhaps something much more simple (and scientific) in nature. Evidence for this comes from the Orchid station episode, and further reinforced by the mental time-travel that people who try to leave the island encounter.
• The Oceanic Six are the only ones who can leave the island. These people can leave because they were not near “the hatch” when it imploded, and thus were not exposed to the massive electromagnetic burst that erupted from within. Why was the hatch stopping such a huge electromagnetic source? It probably has something to do with time travel /extra dimensions.

That’s all for now. Battlestar write up tomorrow.

Yes, another blog, and one about pop culture no less! As if we all haven’t seen enough of those already. I know, it’s bitter, biting, crowded field. But, I’m not writing to be the best. I’m not even writing for readers. I’m writing for myself. Anyone else who happens to read this can consider themselves to be more than a little bit voyeuristic.

Okay, perhaps I started this off on the wrong foot. I’ve become a jaded writer, which stands in rather stark contrast to the rest of my life where I’m usually a pretty happy guy. But, I did work for a few different newspapers and magazines since about 2004, and through those experiences I learned a few things.

First and foremost – working for a print paper that relies 100% on ads to support it sucks. In that particular field the term journalism could easily be replaced with marketer and I think the entire industry would benefit from the new label. I saw the editors ground down under the weight of trying to salvage some semblance of journalistic integrity while still paying the bills and let me say I would not want to be them, not in the slightest. And so I didn’t become them. I got tired of being a word-whore and left the local entertainment rag behind me after a few years and a handful of cover stories.

I learned handily from my lessons at that type of periodical, and ensured that my own online magazine didn’t ever fall prey to the advertisers by keeping said magazine advertisement free. This meant that I had to rely on an all-volunteer staff. This, of course, left limited power in the editorial staff and meant that quality writers would only stay if they loved the project. As a team, we gained a modest readership, and we soldiered on through three redesigns over the course of nearly three years before finally shuttering that project at the end of 2007. The experience was stressful and fulfilling at the same time, and dished out experience I couldn’t have ever asked for.

And, like the rest of the internet, I’ve had more than my share of blogs. Like many, I started with a Blogger.com account. This first Blogger blog led to a few more, then a Wordpress blog, then a few more, and finally landing me here four years to the day later, with TLB. These various blogs on various platforms each carried their own lessons. Ideally, write for yourself, if you want to enjoy your blog. Keep your content-scope limited, if you want to get readers. If you really want to get readers, make provocative (and if you can, ill-informed and hastily concluded) political statements. And perhaps most importantly, if you want readers, you’re probably writing for the wrong reasons. That type of pandering vanity never did look good on me, but the best of luck to those who can pull it off.

Three different mediums and a slew of different constraints. So, here, four years to the day later, I’m tossing the first post up on TLB. Pardon me if I’m not writing for you, but I’m not. I’m doing my best to combine the past four years of writing and differing mediums into a little pet project that provides an outlet, as I no longer write for a living. Goodness, I almost added the cheesy (and expected) line, “I now write to stay alive.”

That would have been so tragically emo I would have had to kill this blog on the first post

So, what am I planning to do with Tastes Like Blue? Well, the header does a pretty good job of identifying what this is all about. Like most Americans, I have a questionable love for infotainment, so much so that my spell check didn’t flag the word. I also have an affinity for culture at large, and I love to trace along great big paths, connecting the dots between isolated events to try and figure out history as it’s going on. Depending on your personal persuasion, you either say that as cool or nerdy, a small subset of you, my nonexistent readers, might actually be able to balance those two words as equal. That small subset may stay. Those who thought it was cool, you’re on the fence. And those of you who use nerdy in a derogatory sense, don’t ask me to fix your computer when you’re bogged down in spyware.

Why the name? What the hell does “tastes like blue” even mean? Fuck if I know. Though I did think of it long before a similar line was used in the Simpsons episode “The Debarted.” That line in question, “You can really tastes the blue” had no bearing on this site’s name, though was found oddly apropos, especially when considering that traditionally drawn cartoons are written a year or more before they are ever aired.

As you can see, I like me some cartoons. I like a great deal of television, but I try to only watch the good bits, you know, Lost, Heroes, Battlestar… I also listen to music en masse and have done my fair share of music journalism. So, expect some of that to be featured here. Movies have become sort of a sore subject with me. Back at subter, Mumah and I used to run a column called “Pure Speculation” where we reviewed movies without ever seeing them. Sadly, we maintained a pretty good average with regards to being right. This, of course, doesn’t mean that I won’t call out shitty movies for being shitty movies. On the contrary, I plan on doing this as often as I can stomach it.

I think that pretty much sums things up. It’s now officially April 10^th here on the East Coast. This makes it my Four Year Blogiversary.